World’s Biggest Jerk Off = Fun Monster

I couldn’t sleep the night before this one, you guys.  I was all tossing and turning with crazy thoughts bonking around in my usually awesome brain.  “Can New Yorkers make good jerky?”  “Do New Yorkers even like jerky?” “What if no one comes and its just me, crying, alone in a huge room with 50 bajillion pounds of jerky”  Well dudes, let me tell you- I am going to take a SOLEMN VOW to NEVER THINK AGAIN!  It only leads to negativity, and what’s the point??? The Jerk Off was BIZONCULOUS!!!!

Check out the awesome coverage at LocalBozo! He called me a genius!!!!! And as always, AWESOME pictures on Metromix by Gabi Porter!!!

As usual, the Bell House came through as the best ever venue in all the land.  Thanks to all the cooks, the Jerky companies and sponsors who helped make this thing happen!

Oh my god you guys, 2 people actually killed there own animals to make their jerky! Serious shout outs to Amy Stonionis for sitting in a blind all day somewhere in Pennsylvania, bagging a huge deer all to make you her family venison jerky recipe!!!  Also, there was famous Dermatologist Bobby Buka, who blammed a 500lb Boar with his trusty .30-06 last year!!!

Dr. Buka dipped his wild boar in chocolate before serving. Dayum.

I’ll talk more about all those dudes, but MOST IMPORTANTLY- Here’s the winnerz!!!!

Judges:
1 #11 Kevin Avanzato Drunk-n-Jerk presents Bourbon Ginger Lamb Jerky
2 #1 Gordon Lingley – The Jerky
3 #13 Cathy Erway – Jamaican Jerk Pork Jerky

Best Fiery – #5 Jimi Daly – Daliente Pepper Sauce Jerky
Best Self-Killed – #9 Bobby Buka – Boared to Death Wild Boar Jerky

People’s Choice
1#7 Fred Raphael – Professor Fred’s Salty Meat
2 #9 Bobby Buka – Boared to Death
TIE
2 #19 Martin Smith Dirty Jerky
3 # 8 Camilla Abder + Sean McDowell – Asian Rubdown, Blind Willy’s Apple Jack Jerky

The judges were EXPERTS!!!! So pumped I was able to gather a crack team of local jerky connoisseurs to judge this thing:  Bam Romero of Bam’s Beef Jerky, Rachel Graville of Gerald Jerky, Gretchen Skedsvold from Ragged Butte, and Liz Bullis from SlantShack!!!

sportz fanz showed! Good thing I put the game on!

Rub, the awesome NYC BBQ joint, was there! Big John’s Jerky was there!!!! Robert Fernandez was there, repping his upcoming Grillin’ On the Bay!!!

And now come join me AFTER THE JUMP to meet ALL THE BRILLIANT CONTESTANTS!!!

#1 Gordon Lingley – The Jerky
#2 Stephanie Venetsky – Pina Tail On the Jerky
#4 Matt and Ashley – Matt and Ashley’s Hamley Recipe
#5 Jimi Daly – Daliente Pepper Jerky
#6 Geoff Topalian – Geoff’s Jerk Jerky
#7 Fred Raphael – Professor Fred’s Salty Meat
#8 Camilla Abder and Sean McDowell – Asian Rubdown AND Blind Willy’s Apple Jack Jerky
#9 Bobby Buka – Boared to Death
#10 Adrian Ashby – Strawberry Jerky
#11 Kevin Avanzato – Drunk-N-Jerk presents Bourbon Ginger Lamb Jerky
#12 Scott Gold – The Shameless Carnivore’s Pickled Pig Pickin’s!
#13 Cathy Erway – Jamiacan Jerk Pork Jerky
#14 Jillian Banks and Talia Ravin – Dry Times
#15 Kyle Hansen and Linda Leising – Tsunami in Your Mouth
#16 Dan Marino – The Jerk Store’s All Time Biggest Seller
#17 Amy Stonionis – Stonie’s Venison Jerky
#19 Martin Smith – Dirty Jerky
#20 Robert Fernandez – Flying Horse Jerky

Sponsors:

 

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